Our perfect healing homebirth

Ok, it has once again been far too long between posts...and here we are three months after the most magical experience a family can have, bringing a baby earthside.

Here is the story from the incredible birth of our baby Raine Lee.

We ROCKED it, like we actually effing ROCKED the homebirth. Our baby girl was born healthy and naturally in our lounge room with only her parents, her aunty, her photographer friend, her midwives and her grandmother watching over us.

Tuesday 25th June I woke up with some strong pre-labour, was checked by Juliana and encouraged to wait and see...by nightfall all signs had ceased. This was one day past our estimated due date and I felt so down in the dumps about it...thinking I would be pregnant forever! Mentally I had prepared for an early baby and to be "late" was just not in my plan. So I treated myself to Bowen therapy and reflexology and then spent my time fighting off Rivers cold. I got sick and wasn't sure if I could breathe through labour or have the stamina to endure the long labour I was expecting. 

Saturday 29th began with mild sporadic "tightening" that I was mostly able to ignore, I made no mention of them and a normal day progressed. After going to bed at 7.30pm, I was woken at 9.30 with full on contractions lasting 30-45seconds every 3minutes, they were so intense that River was woken and not being able to comfort him distressed us both. My sister Loz, was called to the rescue as was Juliana...things were chaos for a while until it was decided that Nick would pick River up which worked out really well. I don't remember the timing of things too clearly but Donna (our photographer) was called at some stage and stayed with us from about 12.30pm!

I remember being examined by Juliana and she was so kind and gentle and it was nothing like my experience at the hospital. It was one of only two vaginal exams performed, and I never knew how dilated I was during labour until afterwards.

On the couch I worked through contractions with music and holding my sisters hands, Eric was stroking my hair when my waters broke BY ITSELF during a contraction, I squealed and celebrated, what an amazing feeling of achievement, this was the first time I knew I could do it myself, that my body wasn't broken. Soon after we hopped in the birth pool, I think we all believed baby was very very close. This was good in a way as my team stayed really present with me the whole time. I panicked when I felt like I needed to poo. This turned out to be the biggest issue for me - I was literally a tight arse the whole labour!! 

Nothing was happening so we rugged up and headed off for our first walk. Juliana and Eric held me as we marched up and down my hilly street in the dark of night, I even managed to walk through a contraction or two. Helen then arrived and while Jules and the others took turns resting we decided to kick it up a notch. I had spent most of my contractions on all fours or leaning on Loz or Eric, but Helen ordered skin to skin...even started tearing off Erics' jacket!!! We were smooching and cuddling though I was very vocal during contractions, and Helen was actually jiggling my butt to get me to relax my nether regions, it started to work!

When Juliana examined me again she found that my bladder was full, too full, and I couldn't pee. This happened during Rivers birth no no no!!!! A catheter was offered and sent me into despair...this was NOT going to be the same experience. Juliana calmed me down by explaining that they could put it in, relieve me and immediately take it out again. What a game changer. A short time was spent in discomfort and then we were back into it, though my urine showed ketosis, where liver glycogen stores are depleted. I had had nothing to eat during labour and was vomiting quite a lot but I adamantly refused an IV drip. In that case I had some serious work to do! "Sarah, we need to see some progress in the next two hours or we have to talk about transferring to the hospital" frick frick frick, what more could I do? I tried to eat and drink some and Eric suggested another walk. We left the house just after 8.30am, personal trainer Eric came on the scene to have me marching THROUGH contractions. Juliana was reminding me of all the physical feats my body has overcome while Helen force fed me cold vegemite toast. It was so hard.

Back at home Eric and I jumped in the shower, he ommed with me through contractions, shielded me from the cold water (filling the pool up again), and we knew it would not be too long. We got back in the tub despite the fact it was freezing cold, everyone was writing notes or filling the pool with hot water. Helen was telling me to poo on Eric, Loz was whispering encouragement holding my hands and Eric was trying once again to get me to relax my butt.I was getting grunty and could feel the intensity change. It was probably around this time that 'transition' occurred but I could not have told you if it did at all. I was reassured that we WERE in fact doing this. Nick and River popped in to get Rivs clothes and it refocused me. Noone would cut me open again, nonone would rob me of this. My baby would be born NORMALLY, I would ROAR my baby out of my VAGINA because I had WORKED for this.

Pushing took so long I was actually sleeping between contractions. It was really frustrating to feel her head coming down during contractions and then return in between them. Eric had moved in front of me and I was literally using him to get me through, pushing against him or relaxing on his shoulder. There was snot everywhere and yeah it hurt but I didn't care. I was listening to the loving voices around me, Jules talking me through the pushing, Helen smiling at me and feeding me gatorade, Loz telling me how strong I was and Eric riding it out with me. After about three hours her head came out in one push, her body came out in the next. "Reach down and grab your baby" said Juliana, as Eric and I both grabbed her to my chest. 

We named her in the pool as we waited for the placenta, a beautiful name in honour of her grandmother.

The most emotional moment came when we were lying on the couch afterwards, feeding and snuggling, as I exclaimed "I can feel my legs!". I cried for what I had lost with Rivers birth, I cried because Nick had missed out on a beautiful birth for his son, I cried because we did it; an unplanned pregnancy after the trauma of her grandmother passing, after a sad divorce and a very new relationship. The hurdles we jumped to have a HBAC, the doubt I faced, the pressure I put on myself, the changes made mentally, spiritually and physically. We chose the BEST team to support us and we gave birth with LOVE around us.

A happy update

Because a Facebook post is never enough...

We were blessed to welcome baby Raine Lee Blyth earth side on June 30th at 1pm. It was a beautiful healing home birth that lasted 16 hours of hard work. I was supported every step of the way by Eric, my sister Lozzie, our friend/photographer/client Donna, and our two amazing brilliant midwives. I never once felt like a client, I felt nothing but love in our space. Nick & River had some daddy/son time as it was abit intense for Riv & I really needed to focus on the labour. I'm writing my birth story to share at a later date. I don't feel like a super hero for doing what I believe is normal and natural. But I am so proud that we researched the best option for us to bring Raine into the world & we ROCKED it. We've even been asked to be guest speakers at a talk on vbac later in the year.

So she is a beautiful peaceful addition to our family. We haven't swaddled her once, she has fed really well without shields (I had to use them for Riv for 9weeks & had all sorts of issues afterward). I cried so hard after her birth because I could feel my legs...but I have no resentment left about Rivers birth. The issue was NOT my body, it was NOT Rivers size...it was the time frames & the system that I don't fit into. 

So big thankyou to anyone that followed this journey, that believed in me, that supported me. I am so thankful ❤ 

Here are some sneaky snaps, I will blog again soon. 

Cheers & Giggles xx

Any minute now...

The clock is ticking...haha I actually cannot believe I've made it to full term but that's ok babies come when they're ready! I'm very trusting of the whole birth process which is helping me with patience. As I lay here trying to feed River to sleep (hello practice contractions) I'm finding myself antsy...I would like to get up for a drink and I would love for my dog to stop effing barking. It's annoying having Riv squirm & fight sleep. It's also annoying that I have to lay on my left side. It's even more annoying that this baby isn't here yet!!! 

Some of you know I am reading "Buddhism for Mothers", not so I can become a Buddhist but so that I can apply the principles to my daily life. I do feel more peaceful, more patient and more compassionate. I do feel less attached to things that will make me happy...allowing myself to accept life as it is. Of course this did not apply when our psycho neighbor threw cat shit at Eric (yes it was probably our cat) & threatened to kill Raf. It also doesn't apply when people get too big for their boots, when arrogant people act like they are SO much better than you. Buddhism teaches us to view each situation with fresh eyes and compassion, for some reason despite knowing it is probably insecurity that causes people to act a certain way, I still see red (cue area to work on!).

So I thought I would let you know what I'm eating at the moment. My measurements are good & I've set some realistic goals for my post partum figure. When I wake up I make oats for River and a giant cup of raspberry leaf tea for myself. I have my B12 supplement and usually clean up the kitchen or read while Riv eats. Sometimes I eat toast with Vegemite or days like this morning I enjoy quinoa porridge. Then I usually make a juice sometime in the morning with Kale, oranges, apple & whatever else is in the fridge or fruitbowl. This is to mix my iron supplement and evening primrose oil in. Lunch is usually soup in winter I made delicious broad bean and wild rice soup this weekend. And in these last few weeks I have been baking & consuming some delicious chocolate or vanilla vegan cupcakes. Dinner is always varied at our house the standout meals over the past week have been hearty winter meals like pasta with vegetables & grilled corn, pan fried gnocchi, pizza made from scratch (thanks Loz) and quinoa/tofu bake. I then usually have magnesium with iron again, another B12 tab & raspberry tea before bed.

I am a huge believer that our babies come when they're ready which is why I am annoyed at myself for being so impatient to meet our little Be. I truly thought I would have an early bub and that is what everyone around me also assumed. It scared me that I may labor like I did with Riv but out of everything I'm very confident that Be's labor & delivery will be so very different. 

Our gym is affiliated and almost good to start advertising, I could not be more excited for Gav, Eric & myself. I'm also so proud that we didn't give up. I am looking forward to going back to work because I feel like winter has delivered us some very sooky athletes who may just need a Saresy kick-up-the-ass! It'll be good to provide some competition & hopefully inspire everyone to keep pushing hard despite the cold weather. The clients that are training with Eric or having some time off PT are keeping in touch & they are all doing SO well. This is cause for celebration & praise, my girls have worked so hard, come so far and are STILL not giving up, you know who you are.

To the night crew at Crossy I've been hearing great things. It makes me excited to watch all of your PB & smash your goals when I come back.

Anyway things are good, send me all your hurry-up-baby vibes and I will keep you all posted. Thankyou for coming on this journey with me :)

Cheers & Giggles xxx

My birth circle

We had a meeting today with everyone who will be in attendance for the birth of Be. My little sister was obviously not there, too busy enjoying the sunshine up north! But we had both gorgeous midwives & our birth photographer over for a chat (and some cheeky choc chip cookies!). One of the things I adore about independent midwives is that our appointments aren't rushed. We spent HOURS discussing our birth plan, all possible outcomes, everyone's roles on the day, all the things we need, what to do with the placenta, how we all have visualized the birth...I felt so looked after and surprisingly enough I felt so loved. 

This is a quite overwhelming & intense feeling for me...to place my trust in my birth team when I will be so vulnerable but I really honestly just feel love & empowerment. It's not just that our little team believe in birth, they believe in me.

Now we are really ramping up preparing my body, everything else is good to go.

Just thought I would check you all in :)

Cheers & Giggles xx

Rant Alert

Disclaimer *please do not read this if you support any pyramid schemes or don't want to hear me lose my s&!t

Let me tell you a story. I trained someone on & off over about 4years...during that time said person received discounted sessions, sometimes wouldn't pay me for weeks, refused to put in any effort outside of our half hour training slot each week & while I tried to be my enthusiastic best I somehow failed to inspire this person. This sucked big time for me...it's really hard when a client just doesn't put in the effort needed to achieve...well, anything!
Now this person has a partner & this couple both left the gym because someone was trying to bully them into buying into a freaking "health" company. The couple didn't have squillions to spend on false advertising the arse end manufactured toxic pills that are meant to replace their meals, or funnily enough on their training.
So it came as a HUGE shock to me when I discovered my client was leaving me so that the couple could GO BACK to the gym & commence TRAINING with the aforementioned BULLY!!!!
Despite all of my QUALIFIED nutrition advice this duo now SELL the flipping (really want to use stronger words here...) "product". The thing that actually upsets me the most is that they have been BULLiED and blind sighted into signing on to a company that will give them nothing. I am disgusted that somebody can push this onto people who have limited finances, and who are actually really struggling with their health. It makes me sick. Funnily enough it will most likely make them sick too.
Please hear my advice. You don't need to take ridiculous amounts of supplements. You especially do not need to take advice from anybody that is out of shape, sickly or who is slowly poisoning a company from the inside out. Please do NOT take nutrition advice from somebody who is in NO WAY shape or form qualified to comment or give advice to you.
To anyone who has been burned by any such companies or persons please know that there are compassionate, qualified people out there who are not interested in taking your money (or your soul) but who are willing to work with and for you to achieve amazing things.

Cheers & Giggles xx

My life as a rollercoaster

Just going to put it out there, you know you have some serious moodswings when your partner has to take your toddler out to do food shopping at 3pm in the afternoon & this makes you mad & relieved at the same time...
Getting closer with 8ish weeks to go although I keep getting confused about the days so I really wish people would stop asking me our due date-sometime in June ok?!
I honestly cannot imagine being this damn exhausted & emotional & SORE for another 8weeks!!!! My back is screaming at me each evening & making it super hard to want to train. Not being able to drive is a blessing but getting super annoying with Eric & my work schedules, I am truly looking forward to finishing up at GoodLife in 4weeks... I'm not sure my bank account will enjoy it :s
It's getting to that wonderful stage where EVERYone is commenting on my shape, NOone is enjoying my sarcastic responses and I just want to punch people. Wow perhaps I am a little aggressive today.
My latest bloodtest results revealed low B12 & low iron stores (Fe) so I have upped my dosage of Gundersons red iron & found a good vegan B12 tab that dissolves under the tongue. Although I'd prefer to be on less supps, my body needs them & who knows why? It's still uncertain why some people need supps at different life stages, but I am not so proud as to damage my body when it's indicating an imbalance that I obviously can't control with food alone.
Last week we met our second midwife, my birth team has to be the most perfect match for us, I could not imagine trying a VBAC in a hospital setting without the support of an independent midwife. These women are absolute superstars who I am so extremely confident in their ability to support me. We also got our homeopathic birthing kit which is exciting for both Eric & I as he now has a specific birth "job"!
We have even more focus on optimal foetal positioning as bubs head is down while movable and we want it to engage in a few weeks time. So no more hand/headstands daily (a shame as I find this helpful in decreasing my anxiety), much shorter down dog pose & when I sit, my knees need to be below my hips with my pelvis tilted forwards. I have been reading some great stories on the Birth Without Fear webpage & will now be aiming to walk for 4km twice a day plus cat/cow sequence before every meal, seeing my amazing chiro weekly should help too.
My poor best friend has been copping messages like this:
Monday-having the WORST day, everything is awful :(
Tuesday- oh my goodness things are amazing, received an important package in the mail*, was given some awesome birthing crystals hope you're studying hard!
Wednesday- seriously f@$k this s!#t
...and so on. Eric has been copping the whole "I love you so much" one minute & "why can't you understand me?!" the next. I'm aware that sometimes I'm irrationally emotional but with an intense toddler, two highly demanding businesses, a new puppy & a house to run I'd like to think that throwing a tantrum or two is acceptable behavior...River agrees! I'm also aware that I may be overly sensitive but people being ungrateful has got to be top of my absolute pet hates currently.
So tonight I'm signing out after a pretty shit day, coaching tonight was awesome then we had a delicious dinner inspired by my girlfriend May (vegan shepherds pie, recipe below) & now Eric is reading me some wicked birth stories (very cute).

Cheers & Giggles xx
*hint hint everyone make me happy by sending me things in the post!!

Vegan Shepherds Pie
•two sweet potatoes
•one can lentils
•one carrot
•one celery stalk
•garlic & other spices
•sunflower seeds
•one cup peas
•one cup water

Steam, then mash sweet potato.
Pan fry the lentils with garlic for abit, add carrot, celery, peas & seeds. When everything heated through add cup of water & spices, bring to boil (in pan).
Pour lentil mix into pan, cover with mash, bake on 180 for 10-15min. We added gluten free corn crispy crumbs & chia seeds on top Mmm Mmm :)

The 10week Countdown

We made it through 30weeks gestation, what a hell of a ride. There is so much preparation to do now for our hbac & our financial situation!
In terms of my exercise it's been quite sporadic but I'm trying to at least walk everyday, finding the time to train between River & running two businesses & appointments & cleaning like a possessed woman has been tough. I've also just started needing more sleep...mornings are impossible without a good meal & coffee!
My beauty routine has changed too I'm needing to feel pampered & scrubbed clean so I've gone & bought really creamy body wash for after dry brushing, have switched from coconut oil to jojoba oil for my expanding areas & plain vanilla creme for my limbs.
Because of the size of my belly I get uncomfortable if I eat too much although I feel like I'm always hungry and my diet has been including a tad more chocolate. I've been craving Milo but the choc powder I bought is too sweet & not the same at all! So I also invested in a juicer & I LOVE it...green smoothie everyday, my happy :) On the weekend I ran my first nutrition seminar & it was amazing. I was able to give knowledge without telling anyone what to do, and all my food tasted delicious!

I've been trolling (think this is the right way to say it?!) the Internet for some different ways in which I can spiritually prepare for the birth of baby Be. There isn't too much out there although reading successful VBAC stories has been empowering & encouraging-I can do this! So I thought I would share how I've been preparing. Eric and I 'smudged' the house a few weeks ago, we smoked sage in an abalone shell whilst driving out negative energy & asking the universe to bless our home. I've been visualizing the birth, some different scenarios, but most importantly how it will feel to birth this baby. The other week I had some reflexology done and then I have my second Bowen therapy appointment tomorrow. I've been trying to see my amazing chiropractor at least every second week. Surrounding myself with people that believe in me 100% and just trusting my birth team so much. I've also tried to distance myself from negativity & drama. I'm so lucky to have a beautiful ex-hubby that does everything for our son and we have such a great friendship despite everything we've been through. I'm so lucky to have a partner who has taken on so much in the last six months and still puts me, Riv & Be first. I'm so lucky to have people tell me they love me. And I'm lucky to have friends & even acquaintances who say they draw strength & inspiration from me. It takes so much work to change your mindset, so much effort to be kind to yourself when you've been self depreciating your whole life. It takes work to FORGIVE people for the hurt they have caused you and to forgive YOURSELF for all the things you have done wrong too. I do not want these things to come up during labor, I don't want to feel alone or unworthy, I don't want to feel the pressure of anyone else's expectations, I don't want to feel like I have to prove myself to anyone. What I want is to birth this baby the way I know my body is designed to, to allow myself to let go, to free myself from the pressure to be perfect all the time. This baby is a gift.

Yesterday, while Riv was trying to brush his hair with the comb he stole off the basin, I looked at him frustrated yet smiling and thought 'nothing in a billion years could have prepared me for having a toddler'. It is the most intense, difficult, magical time where one second I want to sell him on the black market and the next I just need to smother him with kisses. We're pretty lucky with River, he has always communicated clearly and while he's like the energizer bunny he's not violent or dominant or aggressive. It's interesting watching him learn about sharing, I don't believe in forcing children to share so I generally don't say anything unless he takes something off someone else. We explain that the object of his desire belongs to someone else/will be there when that someone leaves and that if we are patient we can have a play soon. This is not always effective (at all) but I think consistency is the key. It's also interesting that River hasnt developed a particular attachment to any object, no toy or blanket or Teddy. I have absolutely no clue why this is or what it means, it's just an observation I made this week.
I've also been very protective of him and don't want to be away from him lately, perhaps because I know this special time we have just us is going to change? And he's been an absolute boob machine the last two weeks, I think perhaps my milk supply is increasing? Again it's a lovely yet slightly annoying situation!

Thought I'd leave you with a little image from my photoshoot. My photographer is also a client & now dear friend who really inspires me with her passion for her job. I've never had a photoshoot that was just so much fun & such little pressure <3